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Poetry has always been this magical thing to me, the untamable unicorn. It's a secret language that no one fully understands. We can all write it. We can all speak it. We can all understand the words but the translation is different to every set of eyes and ears. What makes one person laugh makes another cry, while a third won't understand the rage suddenly boiling up within their gut. Poetry has the power to transcend literature, touching our souls with the grace of a calligraphy pen or disemboweling our sanities with the lethality of a katana. Emotions are delicate creatures, subject to violent shifts without warning. We are all a chinook wind singing through Colorado. We are all the tranquil surface of a lake before our sun crests the horizon. We are all the storm. In this life of physical limitation and confinement, poetry is the simplest connection our tongues have to the intricacy of each other's souls.

 

"We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience."

- Pierre Teilhard De Chardin

 

 

 

 

THAT THING

(Poem)

 

I will not be found upon clouds, and scented clean wipes

Neatly, discreetly, dissecting my mind

Waving, behaving, while I carefully prod

Saying please, pardon me, to that thing in my thoughts

Nor winding, never finding, that prize I desire

With cowardice and my piss always dousing that fire

 

No, that is not me, isn’t free, to crave with a lust

Beyond perhaps and relapse, I choke on my must

Beyond denial, it’s primal, and I must see red

If I am to face it, then chase it, and drag it to bed

Be not reduced, nor seduced, to a blissful defeat

But retake, dominate, in the throes of the sheets

​

I hunt not in light, but in night, in the dark

Satisfaction, no distraction, when igniting the spark

I have learned, fire burns, in raw, primal passion

Not in defeat, on my knees, with no gentle compassion

I must be legion, commit high treason, and relinquish control

Forget my name, go insane, drawing that thing from my soul

​

I will bleed, bare my teeth, and dig everything out

Scream at God, then applaud, shove the stars in my mouth

Beyond breath, beyond death, my postmortem obsession

Nightmare screams, contain dreams, my moaning confession

Flood with rage, eat the cage, only then can you start

Surge with hunger, tear asunder, free that thing from your heart

​

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IMPERFECT POEM

(Poem)

​

To those who see imperfections and the poem's flaws

To those who see rough edges, blind to the deeper cause

To the disappointed head and cold nose to the sky

To those who point a finger instead of asking why

To those who miss the birth, seeing only the cocoon

To those who miss the stars while searching for the moon

Take my hand and listen close, for now it's time to see

The poem for its real self and what it's meant to be

​

The poem is raw, its syllables askew

Here there are too many, and randomly too few

Some words don't rhyme and some words are mispelled

As the pencil desperately expressed words that can't be yelled

Some words are smeared; you can't read what they say

Because the tears of the poet washed those words away

Some lines are crossed out, with notes and arrows on the side

Because the poem's imperfections don't hide behind its pride

Some of the poem's happy, then randomly turns sad

Sometimes the poem gives no warning of bliss to blackout mad

The poem can be blunt and blare, staring without fear

Wishing for you to feel and begging you to hear

​

The poem has pains and truths wished never heard, nor spoken

Because to fix an aching heart, it must often first be broken

The poem fights for retribution, change, solutions, hope

The poem cries for God at the end of its breaking rope

The poem fights for honesty, and sometimes even death

The poem fights for what it believes with every shaking breath

The poem fights with imperfection in a cold world demanding

The poem bleeds from judgment but the poem is still standing

​

As long as the poem's fighting, the poem's already won

This epiphany is truer than any 'perfection' you've ever done

It doesn't matter if you understand or ridicule

The open mind advances, while the closed mind is the fool

In this world of expectation, where the outcast is the poet

I'll turn down the perfect acts; I'll always chose the poem

Now you've heard my piece, you may love me, you may hate me

But I embrace my imperfections because I am exactly who God made me

​

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CRIMSON SUNRISE

(Song)

​

I see you sitting in a corner

Where it's dark and cold

Hiding in your arms

And crying all alone

Pleading with your angels

To take away your pain

I whisper through your tears

That I'll see you again

I'll see you again

 

I know that you miss me

Know I miss you too

I've kissed the wings of butterflies

I pray they find you

I guess that it's my time

There's no point in blame

So, may your hurt be washed away

Like tears in the rain

Tears in the rain

 

Goodbye for now, I've gone away

So, let the tears stream down your face

But please known that it's okay

All my pain has been erased

I'll hold you again someday

I'll find you in this better place

So, let your sadness fade away

Tears leave a bitter aftertaste

I'd rather you love and celebrate

And remember the smile of my face

 

Mourning is a process

That we can't escape

But with each crimson sunrise

Allow a smile to replace

May the warmth of that sunrise

Promise you I'm there

And guide you on the road ahead

When you feel scared

When you feel scared

 

Please do not mope in grey

When you think of me

Instead, celebrate in life

Knowing that I'm free

I'm dancing with the angels

And I'm watching over you

So, live your life in jubilation

And I will see you soon

I will see you soon

 

Goodbye for now, I've gone away

So, let the tears stream down your face

But please known that it's okay

All my pain has been erased

I'll hold you again someday

I'll find you in this better place

So, let your sadness fade away

Tears leave a bitter aftertaste

I'd rather you love and celebrate

And remember the smile of my face

​

 

 

DIRTY SPONGE

(Poem/Song)

 

I’m a calloused cadaver

The life I’m living is a lie

I have rosy flesh on the surface

But I’m falling apart inside

I’ve denied my strongest emotions

Now this is how I feel

Like ten seconds after going light headed

Where nothing feels real

I’ve captured these emotions

Like the wild beasts they are

I’ve buried them inside

Though they’re tearing me apart

In time they shall go temporarily tame

Imploding with pain and forgetting their name

Hypnotized by hatred, all going insane

Nesting a disease inside of my brain

If ever they escape, they'll feel lost

They’ll forget their reason but remember the cost

Attacking everything and everyone

Forgiving nothing and sparing no one

Like a serial-killer, gut-spiller who broke the chain

Ready to torment even those close to them

And blanket them in pain

 

Tuck that storm in a bottle

And seal it tight

That was a glimpse at reality

Now blow out the light

Soak it up, soak it up

Don’t let any pain escape

Punch my heart until it beats

And swallow all the ache

 

I take my irritations, ticking frustrations

Hide them piece by piece

My building irritations, burning frustrations

I fear this disease

 

Oh, I will act passive aggressive

Instead of making a mess of―peace

Shattered masterpiece

Absorb and I run

It’s dirty, disgusting, addicting, embarrassing

I’m a dirty sponge

Absorbing, storing, abhorring in me

Negativity

God, it burns like hell

To those who've joked me, provoked me, and choked me

Beware

You serpents, I swear

I will unleash myself

 

Damn it, Jekyll, what the hell

Why do I hide from my own damn spell

It’s not a curse or a disease

It’s a reprieve, a release to breathe

We all have monsters buried beneath

They eat and feed on our insides

Itching, scratching to get outside

Begging for the chance to come to life

For too long have I hidden mine

Imprisoned and caged my angry side

I need to release my rage and unleash Hide

 

So, as my fists tear through my chest

I’ll take my sponge and wring the rest

A shrilling scream as the water hits

Wring me free of all my shit

 

Your cruelty taunts me

Cruelty haunts me

You feel no remorse

I will fake a smile

And all the while

I long for your corpse

 

Oh, I will act passive aggressive

Instead of making a mess of―peace

Shattered masterpiece

Absorb and I run

It’s dirty, disgusting, addicting, embarrassing

I’m a dirty sponge

Absorbing, storing, abhorring in me

Negativity

God, it burns like hell

To those who've joked me, provoked me, and choked me

Beware

You serpents, I swear

I will unleash myself

 

Day out, day in

My fucking skin

Is growing thin

This self-made prison smothers my inner kid

So, I have dreams to kill

Twisted thoughts of cannibalism

I am filled with ill

Lust for nightmares in me to become real

I want blood to spill

The hidden sins within begin

Seeping, creeping, escaping

All my caged, infected rage is gaping

Checkmate is fate, now it’s too late

My irate hate, burns for the words

That you’ve been saying

My God, I am done praying

For these emotions, like raging oceans

To stay in

I cannot stand this shaking

You are in danger, my unstable

Anger has awakened

I will absorb and store

This shit no more

You push me, but do not see

The storm in store

My fluid rage will bleed and pour

Black rising up from beneath the door

Dripping down the walls

Pooling on the floor

Bathing the grooves where fingernails tore

You breached my walls

My patience falls

Now the lights go out

Unleash my pain

Unleash my hate

You’ve let my monster out

Darkness closes in as I blackout, snap to blind

You awoke my demon, now run for your life

 

You push me closer, closer to the edge

You’re sick, you think it’s funny

You woke my demon, now you’re fucking screaming

There's no point in running

 

I'm done acting passive aggressive

Instead of making a mess of―peace

I hate this masterpiece

Look how far I've run

It's dirty, disgusting, addicting, embarrassing

I hate this dirty sponge

Absorbing, storing, abhorring in me

Negativity

Now I'll unleash Hell

To those who've joked me, provoked me, and choked me

Be scared

You serpents, this is where

I will unleash myself

 

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